It's Been a Tough Day

Well, I guess I'm going to have to use this blog more an a therapeutic outlet than anything.  You may just begin to stop reading but goodness gracious - I've got to type.  Today was hard.  All the way around - it was a hard day.  But God's graciousness did shine through.  He is faithful and He is good.  One of my favorite verses in the bible comes out of Job.  I will have to look up the verse but it's when Job is just in extreme pain and has lost all he had - including his 10 children. It says he was unrecognizable to his friends b/c of his awful skin disease.  His wife encouraged him to "curse your God and die".  He told her she was a foolish woman and said, "are we to accept only the good from God and not the bad?"  I paraphrased with my quotations to the best of my memory at the moment :)  Anyway - I think about that verse and story all the time.  We gladly accept the good that God gives us but complain incessantly about the bad that comes our way.  The bad shapes our faith and gives us perspective of who our God truly is.  If we come out on top - He gets the glory for it.  Not trying to give a sermon - just what has gotten me through this day. 

Let's start the with the really exciting news!!!  Our sweet girl's file was released from the CCCWA today :)  YAY!!  So, our agency sent our pre-approval paperwork that I had completed before the holidays.  We should hear something as soon as a couple of days to a couple of weeks.  In the meantime - all other paperwork continues.  We had our final homestudy today and we hope (fingers crossed) that our I-800a is sent off by Friday.  I will try not to be devastated if its not.  After we send that off - we will get our fingerprint apt from the USCIS.  We are including an expedite letter hoping they show us mercy with our little one who so desperately needs to get home.  Even now, most doctors say her pulmonary hypertension likely makes her inoperable from a cardiovascular perspective.  Bottom line, we have no idea what that means.  We can only hope that "likely" doesn't mean definitely.  But either way, we trust the one who is entrusting her to us and He will give us what we need when we need it.  We just celebrate her file is finally released which is just one more thing we needed to have happen. 

We lost our precious 17 year old peek-a-poo, Hunter, today.  I got him when I was 19 years old :).  He was my first man, first child, first dog, first love and today we had to put him to sleep as the most humane way to let him die with dignity.  He was the best dog in all the world.  Olivia doesn't know yet.  Danny and I went together this afternoon.  My heart is broken over his loss.  It was one of the hardest decisions we've ever had to make.   He started showing signs of aging years and years ago but he's just kept on keeping on.  Lately though, he's gotten progressively worse.  He can barely walk on our hardwood and paces for hours, when he's not sleeping.  He threw up twice today even.  He was getting worse and worse and it was the best decision for him.  Danny and I will talk to Olivia about it in the coming days.  She loves him dearly and he was always so good to her.  She would dress him up and pretend he was her patient.  My neice McKenzie used to do the same thing when she was little :). Elle just loves to hit, I mean pet, him.  :)

Today was tough for more than just that, but for now, let's just leave it at that.  You will get tired of reading it and I will get tired of re-living it.  

To end on a positive note - we believe we have finalized our sweet girls name :)

AnaLei Marie Mann  (that is pronounced "Ah-na Lee")

We all had a part in naming her - even Olivia :)  We can't wait to show her the physical love we already feel for her emotionally.

Love to all,
Julie

Okay, okay - one more sweet picture